Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Rely on your back catalogue #2

(if this doesn’t make sense to you, see the previous post)



IN THE EVENT OF FIRE

  • When you hear the alarm, calmly make your way to the nearest exit.
  • If the nearest exit is on fire, consult the emergency floor-plan for an alternative escape route.
  • If the emergency floor-plan is on fire, report to your building’s safety officer.
  • In the event that your building’s safety officer is also on fire, dial 999 on the nearest phone and ask for the fire brigade.
  • It is entirely possible that the nearest phone is, like everything else in the office, on fire. If this is the case, use your mobile – 999 calls are free on all networks, so you won’t even have to fill in an expenses claim form.
  • If your mobile phone is on fire, you’re starting to run out of options. You could try shouting for help out of a window.
  • By this point, you’re probably on fire yourself. Your situation now is beyond the remit of this poster. Good luck.

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