Taking it easy

I've had such a lovely relaxing and productive day at home today. As you can see above, Jessica is feeling contented too. Yes it's only a two-seater, but if she unfurled her rabbit feet, she could almost stretch the whole way across it. Can you see her tail along the cushion back?

And below: contented snoozer. Jessica is quite a snuffly breather so I can hear her cat-snoring softly while I fold washing and dust the coffee table.


Catching up on housework and making our home a haven is what I have been up to the last few days. From moving into our place four months ago, there are still areas which items had been thrown into (literally) to get everything unpacked. I didn't have the time, energy or inclination to do it in an organised manner.

I redid the kitchen cupboards today though, cheered on by a blog I came across a few days ago called The Quiet Home. I have been particularly enjoying the Housework and Home Sweet Home tags and found my attitude towards housework was changed to something altogether more positive. This lovely lady's enthusiasm really is contagious!

I started by emptying out just one cupboard, a big corner deal with pots, pans, the slowcooker and loads of other items in it. It was a bit of a bother having to reach all the way to the back to get something I used often and there really was no rhyme or reason where things were placed. Still, I have been putting up with it since last October so it obviously didn't bother me that much, or perhaps I'm just a little 'busy' (or lazy?).

Of course that led onto other cupboards and finished up including the pantry. In the end all items were placed in clean-wiped and dried cupboards that made the most sense regards usage. Little used items are at the back, and there is a frequent use cupboard so we don't have to open the big hinged door of the corner cupboard to get out the vegetable steamer pots which we use 6 nights out of 7 at least. I'm now really looking forward to cooking tonight!

I was talking to my husband on the weekend and we both agreed that we are still a bit out of sorts and not really in a routine yet. With moving house, the shop being busier and employing a part-time staff member, we need time for things to bed in.

Even though all this change is positive, it can still be unsettling. We charge into something new (or perhaps are just following the road of our life) and expect our body and mind to be fine about it! So I'm soothing my soul with routine and small jobs done well, and knitting, reading and movies for leisure.

We saw The Descendants after work on Sunday and it was so enjoyable. After originally seeing the preview and deciding it looked too depressing, it was thanks to my Mum who said it was a good watch. And it was. George Clooney does his humour so well.

So nothing ground breaking today, just wanted to stop in and say hi.

A Whole New Mind: Why Right Brainers Will Rule the Future

Did you grow up thinking you were an alien on a very strange planet, because you liked to daydream and doodle and muse over words and invent weird plots for stories?  Even as an adult, until I became a writing teacher and started publishing those plots in books and stories, I worried a little that my brain was not working like everyone else's.

I got good training in how to think linearly, but I really preferred thinking from a global view, seeing patterns and systems and how the disparate pieces intertwined, rather than looking at their separate and orderly parts.

Daniel H. Pink's well-loved book, A Whole New Mind:  Why Right Brainers Will Rule the World, gave me hope.  I wasn't crazy.  I was just a right-brainer.  Many writers are.  Especially book writers, who need to have a holistic view to make their books work for readers.

Pink is the also author of Drive, which is about human motivation.  He understands the brain and how it works--especially for creative thinkers like book writers--and I find his theories helpful in my classes.  For 12 years I've been trying to help book writers learn the right-brain skills that will make their books read as a whole rather than a series of parts.

Cultivating a Holistic Viewpoint--Your Book Needs It
Holistic viewpoints are the work of the right brain.  While the left brain, as I understand it, sees things in sequence and in part, the right brain sees the whole.  Many book writers find themselves at a loss when trying to create this holistic feel to their book.  Chapters come across as individual units rather than part of a larger whole. 

Two skills that Pink describes--narrative and design--are born in the right hemisphere and are useful when you want to make your manuscript feel like one instead of many.

The first, narrative, might seem obvious.  After all, we're book writers, we have a narrator, we write narrative.  But do we really?

Narrative is actually the aspect of story that I call "flow" or pacing.  Strong narrative keeps a reader reading. The flow is like a strong river.  It's often simply a matter of good transitions, how fast you deliver your information, and excellent design. 

Design is about making a story logical yet also appealing to the aesthetic senses.  We consider design when we think about knowing how much to add, and how much to just imply.  It's about skillfully shaping your book with enough image to fire the imagination of the reader.   

This week, your weekly writing exercise is to find a copy and try one of the Portfolio exercises on narrative or design that Pink offers.  Let me know how your right brain likes it.

And check out Pink's other writing at this link.

Plot your historical romance at random

Dear readers,

Another genre that you never have to think of your own plot idea for again. You can thank me later.

The Stupendous Random Historical Romance Roller (pdf)

As pointed out in previous comments, there are virtual dice available online if you don’t happen to have the right polyhedrons just lying around. This said, I have faith in the essential geekiness of my audience.

All the best,

Joel

What are You Struggling With?

This post isn't about me. It's all about you. Every week I'm sitting here trying to guess what you'd like to hear about, when I could just very easily ask you what you'd like to know. Well, today is the day. I want to know what you are struggling with and I'll try my best to help you with it.

So, here's what I want you to do:

1. Comment to this post right now with something you are struggling with right now as it pertains to starting a law firm; and

2. Get ready to get some great information in return.

I can guarantee you that when you post your struggles they are going to resonate with someone else, as their struggles will with you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

UPDATE

Just wanted to say I love the questions so far, and here's the important part, we should all be helping with these answers! Think I've said something dumb? Did something you hear spark a thought? Share it with others. And if you've got any more struggles to share, I'd love to hear them.

And I'll share a struggle of mine.

Right now I'm struggling with really getting to that next level. Business is steady, it's good, but I feel like I'm treading water. I hate that feeling. I'm trying to build on what I already have but I feel like it's too slow.

Keep em coming!

Starting a Law Firm and Dealing with "The Competition" (or lack thereof)

The idea for this article actually came from an article I was reading today about leadership and figuring out how one can become the best leader they can be. The gist of the article was that what we have to offer in the way of leadership is specific to the unique talents, abilities, and perspective that we bring to our relationships, and to try to fashion our leadership style after someone else just because we've deemed them to be successful is setting our self up for failure.

For example, who does everybody want to be like today? Steve Jobs. Hell, even I've written a blog post here about what lawyers can learn from Steve Jobs.

The thing about Steve Jobs, though, was that he was an asshole. He was a genius, but his leadership style was authoritarian, leading by fear. So people are trying to be like this because they think it will make them a great leader. In the end, all it does is make them miserable.

So What Does Leadership have to do with "The Competition" and a Successful Law Firm

I'm going to tell you right now.

The correlation I made with this article about leadership, which by the way, I thought was spot on, and your competitors in the legal field is our propensity to look at who is successful out there in the market and then do what they've done. The correlation is the same too - if you simply try to copy the people you think are successful, you're likely to fail. I want to talk about why I think that is.

1. Your Competitors May Not be Doing as Well as You Thought

One of the funny things about law firms and their success is how deceiving it can be if one decides it should be that way. What I mean is, there may be people you see in court all the time, with a ton of cases, that you think are very successful. But if you pull the curtain back, you might be surprised to see that they are barely keeping their head above water because all those clients aren't adding up in the bank account like you thought they were.

And yes, I know, they may be just as successful as you think they are, too. But here's where I'm coming from with regard to this - who cares what they are doing?

Trying to be like everyone else is a great way to be miserable. It is a great way to suppress your ideas, your goals, and the path of your law firm, all because you think someone else is successful. Just like failing to follow your own leadership style, failing to follow your own ownership style will eventually doom you.

2. Okay, I Hear You, So What the Heck Does that Mean?

Let me start this part of the article off by saying I'm not saying you shouldn't steal a good idea when you see it. Coming up with everything on your own is dumb too. What I'm trying to say is incorporate what you perceive to be good ideas, whether they be marketing, leadership, management, or anything else, into your philosophy as a lawyer and as a business owner.

For example, go read my post about Steve Jobs. I thought the book was excellent. I thought there were a lot of great things to learn from the way Steve Jobs took an idea and made it into the most successful company in history. For example, the attention to detail that Jobs expected of his employees was something I try to take back to my office. But what I didn't take away from that book was that you've got to be a dictator to be successful.

When you start your law firm, take the time to dream about what it will be like. What will you like about your firm? What will you like about your employees? What kind of experience do you want to provide your clients? The answers to those questions are going to define the philosophy of your firm. They are going to lead you where you need to go to be successful. They are your compass when you are making a decision on where the firm needs to go.

3. Wrapping it Up: Dealing with the Competition

I've got to be honest with you, when it comes to my competitors, in a lot of ways I say "what competitors." One of the great things about being a lawyer and running a law firm is the competition is not very business-minded. You aren't going up against a bunch of Harvard MBAs, you're going up against a bunch of Harvard JDs. That's a big difference.

As you set out to form your law firm, don't be too concerned with the competition. I like to think of the competition as a bunch of experiments I didn't have to pay for to run. Take the successful things each incorporates (i.e. those things that you think provide the law firm experience people are looking for) and steal them. Throw away the bad things, and then finish it off with your own ideas.

One great thing I did from the start when thinking about a lot of ideas related to my firm (particularly when it came to business development) was to immediately do the opposite of what everyone else was doing. There are people out there that need your help. There are people out there that will pay for it. Taking an ad out in the yellow pages is the lazy way to try to get in front of those people. Taking an ad out in the bar journal is lazy. Coming up with something no one else is doing that differentiates you from everyone else and demonstrates a strong value proposition is what people are looking for.

How do you deal with "the competition." How happy are you with the direction of your firm. Are you trying too hard to be Steve Jobs and failing to take advantage of your own strengths?

As always, I love hearing your comments, questions, and suggestions. Let's hear them!

Recipe for a good night’s sleep

Gosh, time just flies between posts for me at the moment.

We have finally employed someone apart from my husband and myself in the shop. She is wonderful and with us three days a week, but it still seems like I am always catching my tail.

Yesterday I had a day off at home to bless our abode with cleanliness and order. Looking forward to a day such as this, where I go nowhere and see no one (except for Miss Jessica, who is my little shadow), makes me realise how much I love living a routine and simple life.

When life gets hectic, I realise I invariably end up going to bed too late. Often it is not from doing a job which needs to be done, but just because I am fluffing around. Perhaps if I feel rushed and busy, going to bed early makes me feel guilty because there is something else I could be doing?

I like to make a conscious effort to take these steps in order to have a good rest and wake refreshed the next day.

- Early dinner (served around 7 is early for us), 1 glass of wine maximum, or sparkling mineral water
- Computer turned off before dinner/no computer after dinner or at least 1 hour before bedtime (not only does the lit screen wake up my brain, but I find myself click-click-clicking my time away)
- Read after dinner instead of the computer or tv, with a cup of tea
- Take plenty of time for my bathroom routine – makeup removal, cleansing and moisturising, brush and floss teeth.
- Lights out well before 10pm

Any tips you could add to the blissful-night's-sleep list?

Plot your SF at random

Dear readers,

Another in the series of tools for the inspirationally challenged. This week it’s the turn of SF and there are over 55 million possible plots, none of them particularly feasible:

The Fantastic Random SF Roller (pdf)

Enjoy, and don’t forget to share your results.

All the best,

Joel

Making a Map of Your Book's Structure--Three Different Kinds of Storyboards

Storyboards, the visual map that filmmakers use, are a lifesaver for writers needing to brainstorm the structure of their books. I use them to chart the primary pathway through my piles of material.  A great tool for organizing and structuring novels, nonfiction books, and memoirs, they can be approached in three ways.

Both my online classes and my Grub Street workshop on February 26 play with storyboards , so I wanted to revisit the three kinds you can use, depending on where you are in developing your story.

First, remember that storyboards benefit both writer and reader, but in different ways.  For the writer, they give the first glimpse of the book's structure.  I couldn't possible create publishable books without them.

For the reader, the storyboard smooths the pathway through the story.  Holes in the narrative become very apparent and can be filled.  Too much talking also shows up clearly--as well as digressions.  Storyboards help you trim the fat and bulk it up--wherever each is needed.

But storyboards can also help you chart a character's growth, or the development of a place (setting).

Storyboard Resistance
Many writers resist storyboards.  They aren't always as fun as the "flow" writing that we think of when we imagine creative writing.  You have to use the more linear part of your brain. 

On good days storyboards yield tremendous insights into why that &*%% chapter feels so out of sync or what kind of ending might work best. 
On bad days, storyboards feel like bossy mother-in-laws, telling us what we're doing wrong. They point out exactly what we don't want to look at about the book-in-progress: where we have too much blah-blah-blah, where we've skipped a juicy opportunity for conflict, where we've stayed on track or gone on a tangent. Essentially, it becomes clear as day where the book isn't yet working.

This can derail some writers. 

Storyboards also present, often for the first time, the glimpse of how your book will be when it's actually published.  Sometimes this is so scary (the thought of actually being published!) that writers abandon the project in emotional overload. 

But I believe in storyboards.  I create several for each book I write and I keep the best ones on my office walls, reminders that I am grateful for their linear know-it-all attitude.   Better realize the problems now, via a piece of posterboard in the privacy of your own home, than later via a rejection letter from an agent, yes?

The Golden Opportunity of Storyboards
A big question as you begin your book is this:  How are you going to know if your story flows when it's outside of your own inner worlds?

You can craft a draft, of course.  Get it typed out and printed, read through it.  But it's still hard to see if the idea you presented on page 31 will thread through to page 231 in a way your reader will track.

Some writers make long lists.  I do this too.  Facts to check, threads to follow.  The lists on my desk are as numerous as my printed drafts, after a while, and I start to go crazy under all that paper.  Here's where storyboards present a golden opportunity, like a good map out of a swamp.

A writer needs to know the structure of her story flow, the placement in time and space of each idea or plot point.  It's not just enough to churn out the words. The sequence matters, a sequence that readers can follow, and you need some method to clearly see sequence. Filmmakers use storyboards to provide this.


I use a giant W to structure my storyboards or a row of empty boxes lined up on my posterboard. I place Post-it notes along the W that represents scenes or ideas or chapters, then I move them around until the sequence of ideas equals a reasonable flow for my book.

This kind of storyboard charts the events, the outer story, and you can see if you have enough happening. 

Character Storyboards
Another kind of storyboard charts the character's growth through the book. 

Early in the revision process of my novel Qualities of Light, I did a storyboard for each of the main characters.  I learned, to my dismay, that one of them, Chad, had dropped out of sight in chapter 10.  Not so great because he was competing for Molly's attention as the other love interest in the story.  By crafting a character storyboard for Chad, I could immediately see the problem--and it was not apparent when I read the draft. 

I used a character storyboard to chart the progress of my reader through my nonfiction book, Your Book Starts Here, and realized I had planted too advanced material too early in the book.  Once I saw that the reader (my character, in a sense) wouldn't have understood some of the basic principles by that point, I could rearrange the chapter order to not overwhelm or confuse.  Much better sequence. 

It's not uncommon to emerge from a storyboarding session with an awareness of what still needs to be written--whether it's an event or a scene to show an aspect of a character.  I usually find missing sections or even chapters, places where a character or location has dropped out of sight, transitions that need to be made. Research still to do. 

Setting (Container) Storyboards
Sometimes a book's setting is so real and vivid, it is like a character.  I love books like this.  When I want to create them, I use a storyboard to track the "development" of my setting--how it grows in influence and changes in impact through the story.



So a third way to use storyboards is for your setting, or the "container" of your story--its culture, value and belief system, its history and atmosphere, the physical and psychological effect it has on the people and events. Chart the images, when you do this one.  How do they change as the story proceeds?  (Scroll down to review the impact of images in the post from last week.)


What If You're Just Starting ?  Using a Storyboard to Brainstorm I also use storyboarding during the first weeks and months of my book journey--when I have little written.  I imagine, or brainstorm, ideas for how I might create the narrative.  On the Post-It notes, I jot scenes or ideas or things I want to include.  Then I begin arranging them on the W storyboard, just to see what I have.  Most of the time, I get more ideas from this.  In fact, ideas start flooding in.

Storyboarding really lets you see possible ways to bring your book into manifestation.

So you can use storyboards to begin your journey or to organize it when you start to feel restless and overwhelmed with the amount of words you've collected.  It's always a good time to storyboard when you want a clear direction and development of your original idea.

This Week's Writing Exercise
This week, watch the video below. 

Then get yourself to an office supply store. Buy a posterboard and some Post-It notes. Go home, take a deep breath, and try creating your W storyboard.  Start with just two moments:  the opening and ending of your book, by asking yourself the questions below.

1.  Where might you begin? What moment do you see launching your reader into your topic or story? Write a note about this on a Post-It and place it on the storyboard.

2.  What moment might end your book? Where would you like the reader to be at the last page--with what new understanding, hunger, idea or feeling? Write a note about this too.

If you get brave, if you get enthused--as I did--see how many of the other Post-its you can place on the W.

Plot your folktale at random

Dear readers,

Continuing last week’s experiment in randomly generated storytelling, here is another tool for your writerly toolbox. There are fewer possible outcomes this time, but the results are more genre-specific:

The Incredible Random Folktale Roller (pdf)

All the best,

Joel

Creating the Image Arc for Your Book

This week I'm in Florida, treating myself to a workshop with my wonderful painting instructor, Susan Sarback of the School of Light and Color.  It's truly a gift to myself to be able to get away from the chill of New England and get saturated with images of sea, sun, and sky.

It seems fitting that last week one of my online classes created the "image arcs" for their books, a process I didn't have a clue about as a new writer, but which transformed my understanding of story when I found out about it.

Image arcs exist in all books--essays and short stories often have them too, although they are most apparent in longer works.  Images thread something called the "inner story" which is where readers get the emotion from your writing.  Events provide momentum; images provide emotion.  Both are needed to (1) keep a reader reading and (2) make your story have an impact on more than just an intellectual level. 

When readers "fall in love" with books, it's usually because the image arc is strong and well threaded throughout the chapters, from beginning to end.

But how does a writer begin working with her book's image arc?

I didn't even know the image arc existed when I began my early books, and I worked primarily with editors at the publishing houses who took care of that sort of thing.  I was responsible for the material itself, they did the fine-tuning.  But as I published more and taught more about how books are constructed, I found out about this very important element. 

So this week I want to share with you the writing exercise that my online class has been working on (Part 3 of Your Book Starts Here class, sponsored by the Loft Literary Center).  I find this exercise interesting to do at any stage of book writing, but it's most helpful at revision.

Your Weekly Writing Exercise:  Creating Image Arcs
Images link the parts of your book's inner story, providing a pathway for a reader to follow. 

Images are part of "language" revision.  This exercise asks you to track the key images in your book to see if they create this all-important pathway for your reader.

1.  Look at the 5 main moments of your book.  You can use the W storyboard, as explained in this video I made.  Write down the events associated with these moments, as specifically as you can.  To do this exercise correctly, it's important to choose one event or a small series of events that happened in the same time frame (not over weeks or years, for example, but in several hours or one day). 

2.  List the primary location for each of these 5 events.  You may also notice that certain objects, or details of atmosphere such as weather, stand out in these events. 

3.  Find the key image in each of these 5 locations.  The key image might be a body of water, an object, a certain sense like smell or weather, a building, a color, a texture.  Make a list of these 5 main images.  Note:  you may have images that repeat within these 5--that's fine.  Ask yourself how the repeating image changes, evolves, at the different points.

4.  Now look at the chapters between each point.  They are bookended by a pair of images, yes?  (Act 1 has two main points, triggering event as #1 and end of act 1 as #2.)  How does each chapter between those bookends continue the image you begin and transition to the image you end with?

5.  Can you build this pathway, or image arc, in the chapters between your points?

This is a wonderful but challenging exercise.  If it interests you and you'd like to work more on it, consider attending one of my summer or fall retreats on beautiful Madeline Island (July and September this year), where we spend five days together exploring the deeper levels of your book--including its image arc.  

Starting a Law Firm | Leaving Blogger | Book Update | RJon Questions

Okay, it's Friday, and I'm about to go home. But, I didn't want to leave you empty handed, so I figured I'd throw a little post at you. This one is another reader question, this time about RJon's services. I've talked about him before (here, and here at least) but thought I'd talk about him again since I got two questions about him this week.

Before I get to that, though, I want to let you in on some info. First, I'm moving this blog off of blogger. It's going to be gone from here as soon as I get it all set up. The new URL is http://www.startingyourlawfirm.com. I'm moving away from here for one simple reason - I want to own everything about the information I produce. I simply can't do this here. I'm all growed up and it's time to move on. When I finally get everything moved I'll let you know, but just keep that in the back of your mind.

Second, and probably more importantly for all of you, I've actually started writing my book! The plan is to spend 1/2 an hour on it per day. At that pace, it should be done in a few months. I wanted to let you know that it was actually happening because I spent a lot of time talking about it earlier. Also, there is going to be an email signup for the launch of the book and, if you sign up for the list, you're going to be automatically entered into a drawing for some free ones I'll give away. So just tuck that away in the back of your mind as well.

Now, on to the good stuff.

How has RJon Helped Me with some Basic Questions Surrounding Starting a Law Firm?

As you might expect, this was the first question I received this week. It was actually something like:

How has RJon helped with: choosing a practice area; determining my ideal clients; finding out where my ideal clients are; what to do when I actually get in front of potential clients; and my value proposition?

When I wrote this question down so I'd remember to talk about it later I immediately wrote something down right after it. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. I think this quote sums up RJon's help quite nicely.

Now to decipher. To answer the question specifically, he didn't help me choose my practice area at all - that's what I wanted to do. He helped me determine my ideal clients, find my ideal clients, create a system for demonstrating value once I got in front of them, and with my value proposition. Okay that's all.

I'm kidding. Here's the thing about RJon - he's got a million great ideas. He knows his stuff inside and out. He's genuinely excited about helping you out, and I think when you succeed he feels like he succeeded (as he should). But there are things RJon won't do. He won't tell you who your ideal client is. He won't create your sales system. He won't push you off the ledge so you'll go do that marketing idea you think has great potential.

One of the things you've got to come to grips with if you want to start a law firm is that you are going to have to take some chances. There are no sure things. Now, should you be reckless? Of course not. But, should you think about a situation, create a plan of attack based on what you assume to be true, execute that plan of attack, evaluate that plan of attack and adjust as needed? YES!

What I like about RJon is that he has a great ability to take what are your general ideas or thoughts and create a good plan to create a good plan of attack. He can tell you the questions you need to be able to answer, some roadblocks you may face, and some solutions you might try to employ. But he will not execute the plan for you.

I'm going to talk about him in the next question too, but if you want to check his site out, click here.

How Much of RJon's Marketing Ideas do I Use?

I thought I'd talk about this a little bit because it came up in a discussion I had with a guy this week. I'm going to talk about this meeting in a later post, but this guy had used RJon too, and he wanted to know what I'd used of RJon's that had worked specifically related to marketing.

The answer to that question is some, but not all of his ideas, I used. And some, but not all of them, worked. But I thought the question was more important than the answer. Let me see if I can explain this.

When people come into my office they've typically been charged with a crime. They always want to know one thing -

"how's it going to turn out?"

And I have to give them the same answer every time -

"I have no idea."

Why is that? Well, as we all know, any kind of legal work has twists and turns that are specific to that situation. Just because it seems to be simple and straightforward at the beginning doesn't mean it is. But, when people hire me, they know that I'm there to do some work for them, to do my best, and to get them the best outcome possible.

RJon's marketing ideas are a lot like that. Sometimes they work great. Sometimes they don't. I'd suspect that sometimes one ideas works amazingly for one person and not so great for another. That's just how the world works.

And, I guess at the end of the day, this just gets back to the point of my first section - you've got to try it for it to have a chance to work.

I can tell you this - what trying RJon's ideas has done for me, even if all of them didn't work, is teach me to turn off my attorney switch and turn on my business switch. What often happens is one marketing idea spins off five other potential marketing ideas, which spin off five more, and on and on. They don't all have to catch fire for you to be successful.

Comments and Questions Always Welcome

Have a great weekend everyone!

What to wear at home

I have always been interested in how to live a life of style covering all parts of my life. I don’t just want to look stylish when I go out though and be a slob at home in a house that is dull and dirty.

I want to be like those magazine articles that describe what off-duty models wear, and also the ones that interview famous, fashionable faces.

These interviews ask many questions and the famous, fashionable person describes how their typical day might run, how they decorate their home, what they wear when they do their errands. There are little pictures scattered around of their favourite things too. Have you noticed there is always a Diptyque candle pictured in these spreads?

Often the stylish people are described as wearing a practical day-to-day outfit and a face scrubbed of makeup. Come on. They have spent hours getting ready!

One of the topics that interests me though is how to be stylish when at home with my loved one, to be comfortable and practical but sexy and not frumpy.

Once upon a time when I was first married (to my first husband) I remember in the winter wearing tracksuit pants with gathered ankles (and a gathered waist), a sweatshirt and socks at home. The only boxes it ticked were comfortable, practical (and frumpy). Not sexy or stylish.

No wonder that marriage bombed (I sound like I am taking marriage too lightly, I’m not, it wasn’t the track pants that were to blame, not entirely anyway).

Over the years I have been refining my home ‘lounge wear’ two ways: firstly by using items of clothing that are no longer good enough to wear to work or out (but are still in good nick) or by purchasing inexpensive but good quality basics for the express purpose of wearing them at home (first photo at the top of this post).

I haven’t bought anything for a while, and I was becoming in danger of slipping into frump zone. A friend gave me a pair of leggings that I thought I would never wear (due to having worn them in the 80s and apparently you should never wear a trend twice, and also the fact that my bottom is very round).

However, one day I slipped them on with a clingy long-sleeved t-shirt and found that not only were they much warmer than my wide-leg yoga pants (there was no air getting up the legs) but my husband’s eyes almost fell out. ‘Oh’, he said ‘those look very sexy on. You should wear leggings more, they really suit your figure and are so flattering.’

That was last winter. Now it is summer here and too warm for heavyweight full-length leggings. So I went shopping and spent not much at all for my new summer home loungewear.

Last night I debuted a pair of black leggings, ¾ length with ruched sides (at the hem), and a frog/grass green long singlet/tunic top. It comes down over my bum and almost looks like a mini-dress over the leggings. It clings becomingly around my ribs, without being skin-tight. I tried a larger size than normal but it just looked the dreaded frumpy. And a long top balanced out my short-waist.

(picture below, in new lounge wear, grey marle and green)

I was comfortable all evening, could curl up in the armchair like I imagine an off-duty model or actress might (that’s the thing that might inspire me to be slim, being able to curl up that way, because I put on weight around my stomach!) and my man’s first words? ‘That’s sexy’, said appreciatively.

Not frumpy! I am not doing frumpy at 41, I am doing sexy (sexy at home, just for him, I’m not going out to the pub in this just so you know). And I’m not exactly thin, just a good solid medium size. But with a comfortable bra on, one that I don’t mind wearing at home (the underwire doesn’t dig in, hoorah!) and the slimming qualities of the legging waistband I didn’t have any undesired lumps and bumps and could almost pass for slender.


I also bought the ruched ¾ leggings in grey marle, and ankle length pairs for Autumn in navy and black. My other singlet tops were bought in black and navy. Lots of mixing and matching can go on and I will always have a clean set.

I wash my black/dark clothing separately in ‘black wash’ too, which keeps it looking fresh and new. My legs encased in black leggings flecked with white is not good at all, but that will never happen. The thrifty me says ‘throw everything in together, then you’ll only have one wash’ (warm water, power cost etc), the French Chic me counters ‘don’t you want to look after your clothes properly and have them looking nicer for longer?’

So I do it.

An added bonus of feeling chic and elegant and Parisienne was being more mindful of the amount and quality of calories I put in my mouth. I was still comfortable, but aware of my figure. A winning combo for me.

Should You Take Starting a Law Firm Classes in Law School?

The origin of this post, as with many posts, is a reader question. I wanted to take a minute, while I've got your attention here at the top of the page, to point out that I absolutely love reader questions. Although a big part of this blog is documenting my journey of starting a law firm, it's also become a way for me to specifically talk to all of you out there that are thinking about opening your own shop. And, while I can guess what you are thinking and what you'd like to know based on my own experience, I'd much rather just have you ask me questions that I can answer. If they are good questions, we can start a discussion in the comments. If they are great questions, I'll write a separate post about them and we can discuss from there.

Whether or not to take starting a law firm classes in law school seemed to me to be a great question, so here we are discussing it.

Solo Practice Law Firm Curriculum

I must admit two things here as we get started on this post. First, I didn't take a class like this when I was in law school, and I don't think one was offered (I was in law school 2002-2005). Second, as with most of these posts, I'm writing off the cuff here, so hopefully if we veer off track we get back on eventually.

As I'm sitting here thinking about whether or not a class like this would be worth your time I guess what's most important is what the curriculum is. I can think of some things I think would be vital to learn in a class like this, namely:

Creating a business plan;

Creating a marketing plan (not the same thing as a business plan in my book);

Basic accounting (Quickbooks 101 - not whatever you learn in business law);

Marketing 101 (this would be a practical part of the class - the plan would be theory);

And then the rest of the class would be spent talking about what it means to own a business, what it means to be a business owner as opposed to a lawyer, and everything that goes along with that.

If the curriculum is filled with things like "how to pick the best printer" and "should you have a virtual office or a real office or a home office," I would probably pass. You might have some of that in a how to start a law firm class, but those things aren't rocket science - you need a printer, go get a printer.

You couldn't tell, but I just did a little bit of web browsing to see what was being offered out there by law schools. I wasn't too impressed, to be honest with you. And, I don't even have high expectations. I mean, what can you expect to get from a law school, whose sole purpose for many many years has been to teach the law? Flexibility, strategic thinking, marketing, and other business concepts are simply foreign to most law school professors, administrators, and other faculty.

On the Bright Side, It Can't Hurt

This has been a long journey for me. In that time I've learned a lot about running a law firm. I've also learned a lot about what I don't want to do to run a law firm. This course, for you, is probably just going to be an experience you have to get involved in if you're thinking about starting a solo law practice out of law school. Even if you get one good nugget out of the experience, it's probably worth it. You'll also get to hang out with the coolest kids in law school.

What I Would do if I Were Opening My Firm Right Out of Law School

I've already talked about what I would do if I were opening a law firm right out of law school before, so I'll give you the abbreviated version here.

1. Get in that class. It's law school credit, you'll probably make some good contacts, and you might even learn something you can take with you.

2. Start reading everything you can get your hands on. I'd read every starting a law firm book you can, every sales book that interests you, the one about the "E-myth" (can't remember the exact name), and any other book I've ever mentioned on here.

3. Find a mentor, probably someone that is not in your practice area but that is in one that works similar to yours (i.e. criminal defense and personal injury are related in the way they work in a lot of ways). Buy them lunch and ask them as many questions as you can.

4. Get a job with someone that is successful in the area you want to practice in and then watch everything they do - keep the good stuff and forget the bad.

5. Stop worrying about how to practice law and start thinking a lot about how you are going to get clients.

6. If you can find someone that can offer you an experience like this, take it.

Pretty easy, right? :)

Okay. Now's the time you let me know what you think. Comments, questions, thoughts, and whatever else you can type are welcome.

Plot your story at random

Dear readers,

Hello. It’s been too long. A How To Write Badly Well book has now been put together and is with the publisher. I will, of course, keep you updated. In the meantime, I thought we could try something a bit different.

Authors are asked all the time where their ideas come from. Usually they mumble something about scenic walks or reading the newspaper, then mention the title of their book again and glance meaningfully towards a bookshop. In an attempt to answer this tricky question once and for all, I have decided to turn storytelling into a quantifiable science (this has, in fact, been done before – see Vladimir Propp). To this end, I present the first in a series of handy tools for the muse-averse writer:

The Amazing Random Blurb Roller (pdf)

Use it wisely and please feel free to post your results in the comments section below.

All the best,

Joel

Drawing Solutions--How Visual Maps Help Your Book-Writing Dreams Come True

I first met Patti Dobrowolski at a seminar on the East Coast, at a time when I was trying to manifest a new goal with my writing--finish and get my book on writing, Your Book Starts Here, published at last. I knew I was stuck.  I felt overwhelmed by the need for a good editor and a bigger vision for the book.

I had lots of chapters, but I knew they weren't especially good.

Patti is a fireball on stage.  She loves what she does, which is mostly about drawing or visually mapping the goal-setting process.  She handed out copies of a simple goal-setting worksheet made up of three parts:  (1) a place to describe the vision of how you'd be or feel when your goal was realized, (2) any obstacles that stood between you and your goal, and (3) three bold steps to take.

Patti is the founder of Up Your Creative Genius, a consulting firm that uses visuals and creative processes to help companies and individuals around the world accelerate growth and change. A critically acclaimed comic performer, internationally recognized keynote speaker, writer and business consultant. She talked about how she'd imagined getting into a Broadway show in New York, and how she used this goal-setting method to imagine it.  Of course, it came true.  Since then, Patti has brought her innovative visual practices to NGOs, Fortune 500 companies, small businesses and individuals around the world.


So, in that seminar, I wrote down my vision for my book project.  I imagined finding a wonderful editor who would help me take it the final steps to publication.  I saw it being the basis for my classes, and I wrote down how it would benefit all the writers who would use it. 

Three Bold Steps
The last aspect--three bold steps--intrigued me the most.  I thought about this seriously.  What would be my wildest dream?  First, to find a fabulous editor who believed in my book and would be able to help me take the final steps in shaping it.  I knew such an editor in New York, but she was pretty busy.  I took a deep breath and wrote as one of my bold steps to email her and ask.  She might think I was insane but it really wouldn't hurt.

The second bold step was to take the plunge and get my website revamped.  It was old and tired, and I knew just the right person to help with that.  But what I had in mind would cost thousands.  Was I really able to justify the cost right now?  Would it make that much difference?  I imagined the book being published, people visiting the site, and decided yes.

The third bold step was about my book cover.  I wanted something really great.  I also wanted the interior to look amazing, with some graphics and a clean feel and wide margins for taking notes.  So I wrote down:  Find a designer and typesetter whose work I love.

After the seminar, even though I was reinvigorated by Patti's unique method, I put the chart away as life went on.  Daily demands took me away from my book ideas and it wasn't until a month later that I remembered Patti's chart and what I had promised myself.  I found it and looked over my three bold steps.  They still seemed incredibly scary to me, but I knew they were what I wanted.  I started taking action.

Miracles Happened!  This Method Works!
The editor, to my drop-dead astonishment, said yes.  She and I began working together and within months the manuscript took shape, becoming something so much better than I could've imagined.  With the enthusiasm of that success behind me, I contacted the website designer and forked over the money to start working with her.  When she sent me the template for her redesign I was astonished again--a huge step up.  Amazingly, she also did book design work and I talked with her about a possible cover.  Again, the results were better than I had imagined.  The best typesetter in the world was also easy to find.

Was this magic?  Or just good visioning, with the help of Patti Dobrowolski's wonderful template?  Had she really allowed me to tap into my creativity--my creative genius--in some new way, which allowed these miracles to happen?

I'm a great believer in good visioning.  And a firm supporter of Patti's way of doing it.

Her new book is just out, which gives all the details of how to do this visioning for yourself.  It's called Drawing Solutions and it's wonderful.  She's doing a book give-away contest the week of February 12 and click here to enter the contest.

Questions for Patti
I asked Patti to answer some questions about her process and how she discovered it, then wrote her book.  Here's our conversation:

When did you first know you wanted to write a book?

In 1995, I began experimenting with using visuals to goal set and develop the Snapshot of the Big Picture process. I realized how simple it was for me to make change when I had a visual to help inspire me, and be a road map for the success.  It was at this point that I thought, I should really write a book about this.

 

How long did this book take to write, from first written word to publication?

I started writing the book at a workshop lead by a writer's coach, Tom Bird.  I remember sitting next to a woman at a conference and she was the speaker and her book had just come out.  I asked her how long it took and she said, "Five years."  I thought to myself, I just finished my first draft, it will never be five years, maybe 1-1/2 at best.  How long did it take me?  Exactly five years!

Who do you imagine is your ideal reader for this book?

The ideal reader is someone who has a dream but isn't sure quite how to get it started.  It may be as simple as writing your first book, or creating that change that keeps you up at night, that you fantasize about.  That is the perfect reader, because this book helps to motivate you and get you doing by helping you see that by using a visual and lining up your brain to start working for you, you too can make that dream a reality.

What are some of the funny/tragic/inspiring experiences you had during the book-writing journey?

Tragic:  the typos that were found after I had two copy editors review the materials!  Funny:  how easy it was to get derailed in the process.  Anything became an excuse not to edit!  Here's a synchronistic thing:  Early on when I sent out query letters to get an agent, and one of the agencies that approached me gave me some really solid advice:  The agent said, "Look at other people's websites:  you have to have a slick video, a cool platform, a unique differentiator."  He then offered to coach me for about $10,000.  I declined, of course, thinking I could get that stuff together on my own (which I did).  

Recently I got a referral from a friend to do a private coaching session for a woman in transition (this is a two-hour session I do in person or on Skype and I draw a big map for them real time)  That woman was the former business partner of that agent.  She had left the agency and was going out on her own.

What's some advice you might give a new writer who is interested in putting together a book? 

Discipline is critical!  In my case, what I learned from Tom was to get up every day and write for two hours or a certain number of words, without going back and editing.  

Also, I went all the way through just writing the book before I came back and edited it.  I wrote longhand and when I went to transcribe it into the computer, that was my first edit.

What's your experience with publishing these days and why did you decide to publish the way you did?  

While I did land an agent, he couldn't ever figure out how to get a publisher interested in my book. So I decided to do POD (print on demand self-publishing), which Tom Bird outlines in his writing.  

I think, for me, this was absolutely the best choice. I am still learning about it, but all that money that would have gone to a publisher goes directly into my pocket and that is very satisfying.  It does go right back out the door, however, for advertising, etc.  But I think it is worth it.

What would you never do again, in terms of book writing or publishing?  

Probably never work with an editor I didn't know. I spent a huge amount of money getting a "writing coach" and a New York editor who was recommended by a  friend of a friend.  While I was happy to have them, I see now that they took me down a path that diverged from me developing my own voice, and I eventually scrapped what they had me write and went back to my original idea.

Anything else you want to share? 

While writing a book is an enormous amount of work, there is nothing quite as satisfying as finishing it.  It feels like a huge mountain, but once you are on the top, you see the whole range of mountains there are and yet each of those next peaks do not feel quite as daunting as this one.

Your Weekly Writing Exercise
The weekly writing exercise is to check out Patti's book!  You may have some miracles appear in your life because of it, as happened to me.

Imagine your personal three bold steps, and see what it might take to bring your book into manifestation.

Reader Question

Dear Fiona,

There is magic in everything you write. It is more than just sharing how you choose to live your life. I noticed that every time after reading your post I feel emotionally uplifted/lighter, calmer, happier and more optimistic… I would like to learn how to maintain an authentic positive vibration.

There is something that makes me very sad sometimes. It is relationship dynamic with my parents. They were too busy living their own lives when I was growing up with grandparents. Now when I am almost 37 they need more space in my life than I am available to offer. It takes me to very dark place emotionally and has a negative effect on my productivity.

How to start over and be happy regardless of what past was like? How to protect yourself emotionally from relatives that make you sad? How to build healthy boundaries while still remaining polite?

Thank you.

---

Dear Anonymous,

Since you left this comment on the 7th of January, I have been thinking about what kind of answer I could write. I feel reluctant to actually advise someone as it seems such a big responsibility. I will give it a try though.

My main thought is to tell the truth. Tell your parents how you feel, how they make you feel, and that you want to change the way things are in the future.

If you don’t feel brave enough to start this conversation face to face, do it in an email or a letter. That way you can edit what you want to say before you ‘say’ it, and they can get a chance to digest it. Hopefully then it will lead onto a worthwhile conversation.

I sent my Dad an email a few years ago about something that was bothering me. I felt sick when I had sent it, but we had a good conversation afterwards and I felt infinitely better.

Anything big to talk about is always going to be hard, but worth it. It will feel like a weight has been lifted from you.

If you worry about what to say to them, just say the truth. Say you have been feeling sad about them and feel pulled between them and your life. Let them know they weren’t there for you then and that you have made your own life without them because of this.

See where that leads. If they aren’t willing to change, then there’s not much else you can do, but at least you tried to fix the problem. Hopefully they will be willing to meet you half way (or better still, more than half way) and this could be a brilliant new phase of life, for all of you.

Remember, we only have one life as us, why let it tick away with regrets and unhappiness. If there is something bothering us about our life, it is in our best interest to try and fix it.

To address your other question about maintaining an authentically positive disposition. I try to keep my energy level positive by not dwelling on unpleasant or sad things.

Because I am very sensitive, as I can probably imagine you are, these sorts of things really get me down. It could be a tragic newspaper article, a sad situation about someone I know, or good people struggling to make ends meet.

I still live in the real world, but if there is something I have no control over, I try not to think about it.

I read books that make me happy: spiritually uplifting ones, chick lit, my French Chic library and many more.

Our mind is like a garden some say – if we don’t plant flowers (good thoughts), then the weeds will take over (negative thoughts). If a weed pops up, replace it with a flower to crowd out that weed. As time goes on the flowers will regenerate naturally, as positive thinking is just as much a habit as negative thinking.

Make time for things you do that make you happy. A few examples of my own:

Yoga classes
Walking outside
Carrying out my household chores with plenty of time to spare so I am not rushed and can enjoy doing them
Going to see a movie by myself
Reading at any time of the day
A home spa day or evening
Pottering
Quiet time to myself
Sewing, knitting, needlework, patchwork, crochet
Window shopping and seeing what is new out there without spending a cent, except perhaps for a cold drink or a coffee
Early nights
Planning ahead and being organised
A tidy, clean, orderly, peaceful home
Having a pet

Make your own list and do these things more.

If anyone reading this post has any thoughts for Anonymous, please feel free to leave them in the comments section. I would be grateful as I feel a little out of my depth here!