That Tricky Balance of Show and Tell in Your Writing--How Do You Work with It?

One of my favorite quotes about showing versus telling comes from Anton Chekhov, who wrote, “Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.”  This seems to sum it up.  Readers get emotionally engaged in writing that demonstrates rather than delivers.

Not sure you agree?  Think of a book you may have read recently.  Did you skim any of it, skip some sections?  Go back and look at those pages, and perhaps you'll notice that the author went into her head a bit, perhaps.  Maybe she decided it was a good time to get on a small soapbox and explain something.  You lost interest, as a reader.  That's because telling contains less emotional charge, so we're less involved in the images of the story.

Showing brings image to the page.  It's a demonstration of scene through specific details. Most books need to have more showing than telling nowadays, partly because of our fast-moving culture.  We have a shorter attention span.  Even movies are changing to adapt to the new ways our brains work. 

That's not to say that telling isn't important too.  Once something is framed on the page by shown details, a small bit of telling can deepen the meaning, the understanding a reader gets from the scene.

This week I've been teaching a retreat with 11 writers from all over the world.  We're at Madeline Island School of the Arts, a beautiful art school located on restored farm on one of the Apostle Islands in Lake Superior near Bayfield, Wisconsin.  During class this week we were reading an excerpt from William Trevor's Cheating at Canasta, a short story about a woman who has Alzheimer's.  In this scene, the woman is playing cards with her husband, and although she can't really play cards anymore, he loves her so much that he helps her win.  After a page of showing this sad and beautiful relationship they have, Trevor ends with a line of "telling" that always knocks my socks off:  "I cheated at Canasta, and she won."  Because the telling is framed by earlier shown detail, we totally get it. 

So while telling at its worst brings an almost intellectual assessment of what happened, and showing at its best relies instead on sensory detail (smells, sights, sounds), telling is important. Telling lets us back away from the moment, giving us brief perspective on what's been shown.  While showing places the reader squarely in the moment, telling gives distance.

The key to showing is to demonstrate. This means not interpreting the things you are placing in front of us.

Robert Olen Butler, author of many wonderful stories and novels and instructor at this writing at Florida State University’s MFA program, talks about this in his book From Where You Dream. To learn how to show better, I like to pass along these tips from Butler's book.  They help me deliver emotion in its purest form.

Most important:  don’t dilute your moment with interpretation.

Butler observed that emotion can be delivered to a reader (shown, versus told) generally in five ways. Here is my translation of his terms:

• what I am feeling inside my body (goosebumps on my arm, itchy foot, tight throat)

• what I am observing in your gestures and movements (tearing a small paper napkin into bits, jiggling foot)

• specific memory

• fear, anticipation, desire (projections into future)

• sense selectivity (during moments of extreme emotion, all but one sense goes away)

During the developing stage of book writing, whenever I need to change a scene to more “showing,” I will go through Butler’s list and ask myself how I can bring in one of these.

Your Weekly Writing Exercise
This week, translate a passage that "tells" into one that "shows," using one of the above techniques. What happened?

More on Slimming

‘French women appreciate that Rome wasn’t built in a day (and neither was France), but rather ‘little by little’. The progress of your life towards peak experiences in all aspects of living will take time.

Changes made drastically or all at once are often the sorts of modifications that don’t stick. Like New Year’s resolutions, they are upheld proudly for a little while, but then we fall back to our old ways. Arrive at your new ways gradually, and you will leave your old ways too far behind for easy return.

And if you slip up a bit, you won’t feel a failure; you will know how to get back on track because it isn’t all or nothing. It’s a game of inches.’

- Mireille Guiliano, French Women For All Seasons

This is how I am thinking about my weight loss journey. I arrived at the halfway mark pretty promptly and directly, and have been having a more relaxing time of it for quite a few weeks now. I feel ready to tackle the second half.

I love being slimmer, of my clothes looking much better than they used to, of my legs looking slimmer and my stomach looking (a little) flatter. I love that I feel sexier and more like the chic Parisian femme I know I am in my mind. I love looking like someone who gives a damn and cares about what they look like (I didn't often feel like that when I couldn't fit my clothes).

I have been ignoring my Weight Watchers tracker book for more days than I have written in it though, and as a result have found myself on the slippery upwards slope by a kilo or two.

I am keen to carry on becoming my most ideal self weight-wise. One thing I do know is that writing everything down that you eat and drink definitely helps if you’re wanting to slim down. It might be via a method like Weight Watchers or you might just jot down what you consume and in what quantities. All Weight Watchers does is help you know the 'price' of things.

You could do it after the fact or before, by planning out what you’re going to have for breakfast, lunch, dinner and morning and afternoon tea that that day. Getting into this habit will help redirect and refine what you eat. Planning ahead is the best way of course, but even knowing I’m going to be making a note of what I’m eating will help me be aware of it.

Sometimes I’ll eat ‘whatever’ anyway, but on writing it down, I realise it can be accommodated in the day, if most other things are healthy. Isn’t that how our French sisters do it?

Last night I wrote out my to-do list for today (a day off work and I will be at home). The first item on my list is ‘Be slim’. Normally my lists are a little more practical but why not be whimsical for once Fifi.

First thing in the morning, whilst waiting for the kettle to boil for tea to sip in bed with the Sunday paper (one of life’s little pleasures), I read a few pages from the above book.

It was enough to get me back into my chic mindset and look forward to being disciplined with my diet as a pleasure and enjoyable, rather than that I am depriving myself.

Chic Habits

Lower your voice. In an interview about beauty, the iconic actress Jane Russell said ‘The director Howard Hughes took all of us – Lauren Bacall, Marilyn Monroe and myself – and said, “LOWER YOUR VOICE!”… Lauren Bacall still has the lowest voice of anyone I know to this day. The actresses of today all have these high-pitched baby-girl voices.’

When speaking, I try to make my voice soft and feminine and was aware it could be a little high pitched and girly. After reading this quote, I now consciously try to speak with a lower voice. Not abnormally low that I would sound like a man, just lower in my normal range.

I have to say I feel more chic when I speak in a lower voice. After all your voice is part of the entire package you present to people. Along the same lines I also try to slow down my speaking voice, as I often trip over my words in a rush to get everything out. Not chic!

Creating the Most Engaging Environment--Working the "Container" of Your Story

Writing teachers often cite the trio of event, character, and setting:  major elements to keep track of in your manuscript.  This trio is key to any genre, memoir, fiction, or nonfiction.

All books have something happening, illustrated by scene or anecdote.  That's event.

There's always someone this event happens to, be it fictional character, real-life narrator, or reader.

And there's always
a place where it occurs, the setting.   Together, the trio create an alchemy.  This alchemy engages your reader and brings meaning to your writing.

I always understood event.  I wrote things happening and I enjoyed looking for the drama in my nonfiction anecdotes, my memoir memories, my fictional scenes.  I love studying people and the way they tick, so I always understood the character element too.

But setting was perplexing.  It was easy to write descriptions of physical setting--trees, fields, mountains; the dirty dishes in the sink, the towels on the bathroom floor; the dusty streets of a summer town.  But physical setting never seemed to cover all the aspects I loved in a good book.

What about the culture of the town?
Or the church everyone (who wanted to belong) attended?
What about the political beliefs of a family as a group?
Or the morals and ethics?

These didn't necessarily apply to an individual, but more to the group consciousness as a whole.  Their history as a cultural unit.  Didn't this affect the story and have to do with a kind of setting?  The more I thought about it, the less adequate the word setting felt.  It seemed way too narrow a term to encompass so many vessels that could contain a story. 

So I began to imagine this composite of physical, emotional, political, religious, and cultural setting of a story as a container, like a large beaker in a lab.  It held the experiment of the story, as it bubbled away.  Container became for me a limited but vivid vessel that held my story together--restricting characters until one of them breaks free.  I liked thinking of my setting in this expanded way because it let me really explore the environment that would create the best story.


Container Is Fully Developed Yet Limited
Many writers duly write setting because they're told it's important.  They put in a couple of trees, some rooftops, a few sounds if they're lucky.  But container is much more than this.  It requires the writer to research the background of the story's environment, what made the place what it is at the time the story begins.

Container must be fully developed by the writer, and some of us don't want to do this work.  But a reader really appreciates it.  I remember one of my favorite scenes in Andre Dubus's House of Sand and Fog, where Kathy and Les are in a rooftop restaurant in San Francisco.  As Les reveals something very secret to Kathy, the restaurant is revolving and showing her a different view every few minutes, truly an experience of disorientation.  Here's an example of container really showing us this important moment--and not just physical setting but the drug background of Kathy (a revolving scene indeed) is echoed beautifully in this location.

Your container means everything to the emotional effect of your writing and whether the story engages the reader.  You must know and use the culture and background of your players:  Imagine a young woman of Cuban ancestry placed in a small town in Norway.  Because of her background, her cultural container, she'll act differently than she would in Miami, yes?  Container is what makes that difference.

Container influences event as well.  On a very sultry day, different things happen than on a winter's night.  Or a nuclear waste plant versus a family farm--events will be quite changed by these two containers.

This week's exercise lets you consider how your container could be more fully developed setting, how it can more effectively serve as a frame for how people and events move in your story.

This Week's Writing Exercise
1.  Make a list of three important physical settings in your book. 
2.  Now assign a primary image to each of these settings.  What does the character notice, hear, smell, taste, feel (as in air temperature or texture, not internal feelings of mood)?
3.  How does this image reflect something about the character's container, or cultural past?
4.  How could you align the image more closely?

Being ‘French’

I've been thinking about whether I have actually put into my life what I love to read about. Have I been walking the walk? I'm sure there are women living in Paris who would laugh at the 'French girl' descriptions, or perhaps they really are all like the books say.

I love reading, thinking and writing about the idealistic French girl. Whether it's actually true or not really makes no difference to me. I am inspired to be a better (and better-groomed) person and that's the important thing. So here are ways I have incorporated some French-inspired ideals into my life.

Walking. I sometimes walk purely for exercise, where I put on my running shoes, a t-shirt and a pair of knit pants and walk for an hour, briskly. Lately though I have been blending my exercise walk with errands. Previously, I would walk for an hour, get back and then drive to the supermarket, bank, post office etc.

Now I often have gone out for a walk in my normal clothing, just adding a pair of comfortable walking shoes (not running shoes) and carrying a tote bag that slings over my shoulder. I can then walk to the bank, post office, shops. As long as I'm not buying too much I'm OK. Obviously for a big supermarket shop I take the car.

Natural hair and makeup. I have always worn makeup, however now I wear less. I want a subtle glow, and long, dark lashes. I use a sheer, water-based foundation and use a very light hand with powder, blush, lipstick, eyebrow pencil, eye shadow, eyeliner and mascara. Often on a day at home when I wear just tinted moisturiser and even smaller amounts of the above I think how pretty the effect is. So as time goes on I can see myself wearing less and less - but always some.

With my hair, I had it my natural colour for many years (medium blonde), but now with greys creeping in it has started looking a little... drab. Bearing in mind advice not to stray too far from your natural colour, I have been having blonde highlights and my own colour lowlights together. I have read that French women embrace natural hair colours rather than anything too extreme.

Clothing. What I have taken from the French woman is to wear what I like and what suits me, regardless of what's in fashion. I still try new things, but have come to get a better idea of whether it will suit me or not.

I also know now that I don't like floaty boho pieces, but feel altogether more polished in simple, fitting shapes in soft or bright colours paired with neutrals and not too much black. The process of thinning out my wardrobe is ongoing, distilling the pieces down into ones I love and wear and which look great on me.

Using my good things. I light expensive gift candles, eat off our good plates, and enjoy one of the few bottles of good wine we have stored away for a special occasion. My husband has said this to me more than once that he loves that I use my good things.

We have four gorgeous small glasses rimmed in 24 carat gold that have to be hand washed (I learned that after putting two in the dishwasher - it used to be a set of six). I never used them because... they had to be handwashed. A few months ago, I got them out of the cupboard, hand washed them and used them that night. It felt like such a treat! They really are beautiful glasses and I don't mind looking after them.

Same with some wine glasses which were a gift. When I broke one and had to replace it, one glass cost $30. It put me off using them for a while, but now I do again. I put these ones in the dishwasher. If they break, they break. Better to enjoy them than keep them for, what? The day that never comes?

My Nana died last year, and she was famous for keeping her good clothing in the wardrobe and wearing old clothing around the house. She bought beautiful, expensive clothing but didn't want to wear it (it was 'too good'). Now her daughters and grand-daughters are walking around in her lovely tops and scarves.

She also had boxes of scented body lotions and perfumes stored under her bed, with cheap supermarket body lotion in the bathroom. Perhaps that comes from growing up during the Depression. I'm just sad that she didn't get to enjoy it.

So now when I look into the bathroom cupboard after my shower in the morning, I use my most expensive body lotion first. It doesn't last forever you know. Even if all I'm doing is going to work or staying home. I don't have that many big nights out to save it for.

One such day last week when I had moisturised top-to-toe in rose-scented Crabtree & Evelyn my husband commented how nice I smelt when we hugged. And even if he's not there I enjoy it too.

What French-inspired things are you doing with your day?

Image from Studio Nate on www.flickr.com

Taking Along Your Writing: How to Keep Your Creativity Alive during Your Summer Vacation

I am packing my suitcases this week, wondering about where to fit my writing.  Clothes, check.  Great book, check.  Camera, check.  Teaching materials, check.  The pile is big, the suitcase is small.  Can I take my printout for the novel that's haunting my days and nights right now?  Will these characters, who are living with me every moment, fit in a side
pocket?

As a traveling instructor, I'm used to summer teaching.  I like the chance to get away and see new places, meet new writers, help them take their books to the next step.  It's work for me, but quite enjoyable as jobs go.  But it's all too easy to forget my own creativity when I'm busy with everyone else's.  Even though I have the time, it's much easier to "vacate" and do nothing while I'm away.  After all, there's no writing desk to remind me to sit down and face the empty page.  I'm away from my normal reminders and routine.  Forgetting is simple. 

I do find that being away from home gives me some of that "necessary boredom" that writer Dorothy Allison talks about, that magical element that lets the over-busy self slow down and relax, lets us take in new images and ideas.  The well begins to fill again as I leave behind regular-life responsibilities, as I rest in the rhythm of lake, mountains, and passing clouds.   

But these characters, this book!  Do they need to be left behind too?  Will they still be waiting for me when I show up again?  Probably not, at least not in the same way as when I left.  Long ago, a writing colleague clued me into why:  After three days, writing threads fade.  They are filtered out by other things, not even noticed.  The characters' voices start to get fainter and the writer begins to be quite disconnected from the the flow of these voices.  She can even lose track of the bigger structure of her project, especially if it's a book.  She can forget the key questions that keep her creativity alive and cranking out new scenes.

I don't want this.  I've worked hard all winter and spring to get my momentum moving.

Travel Systems to Keep the Creativity Alive
It makes sense that when we leave our supportive routines, we have to set up systems that let us "hold" our books-in-progress in our hearts and heads, keeping it cooking, even if the desk, chair, computer, and regular writing time isn't in front of us as reminders.
 How do we do this?

Once when I was studying painting intensively, my teacher said to get an artist's notebook, a small sketchbook, and carry it everywhere.  Make it fun.  Each day, sketch a few ideas, nothing serious, just play.  If I'm reading a magazine and see a juicy color that inspires me, tear a piece and paste it into my notebook.  Collect postcards from art museums, add them too.  Make lists of wishes that have to do with art.  Draw a series of empty frames and slowly fill them in with composition ideas.

It worked.  I came home from that two-week trip more inspired than when I left, aching to get back to my studio and start painting.  (I actually couldn't wait; I bought a travel kit of watercolors and began using them midway through the vacation.)

So I got the idea to do this with my writing.  Forget the computer, but don't forget a writer's notebook.  I got myself a cool one, and a great pen.  I began doodling, just as a warm up, just to keep in the spirit of vacation.  Then I started making lists of images that appealed to me, often things I was seeing on the trip.  Cloud shapes, the particularly purple dusky color of a distant hill at sunset, the smell of lemonade with lavender.  New impressions to my senses, like how the dusty southern French road felt under my thin American sandals.  I let myself play, but I let myself stay connected to my writing.

Then one day I began writing questions about my story-in-progress.  This was fun too.  Letting myself dream into the book I had left behind on my desk at home, remembering what confused me about it, imagining ways out of that maze.  You can guess where this step led:  freewriting.  I began writing each morning, when no one else was up yet, over my tea and croissants.  Short, fun freewrites, exploring the questions and images I'd listed.

Travel became an open door.  Like with my artist's notebook, my traveling writer's notebook captured moments I never would've experienced at home.  They made their way into my book, plus several short stories that came to life when I returned home.

Don't feel you have to abandon your writing when you "vacate" this summer.  It can travel with you, in a new form that fits the holiday atmosphere.  Creativity is never something you have to leave behind.

This Week's Writing Exercise 
1.  Before you travel this summer, or while you're on the road (if you already are), get a writer's notebook and a pen you love.

2.  Spend time each day with it, 5-10 minutes, doodling.  Mindless stuff, no purpose, no productivity.

3.  Graduate to images.  What's in front of you?  The ocean, the rolling hills, the desert, the prairie?  A small seaside town?  The cafe on the busy boulevard?  Write down two or three things you notice, as if you were writing a postcard home.

4.  Next, try lists.  Begin to list questions, things you're still wondering about your book.

5.  Finally, get some private time and write the possible answer to one of these questions or freewrite from one of the images, for 10-30 minutes.  Nothing in mind but words on the page.

You may be surprised at where you travel!

Starting a Law Firm | Your Stories

Here's another Friday edition of your stories of starting a law firm. I'll comment a bit at the end.

I graduated from the University of Notre Dame Law School in 2009. I had an excellent job lined up with the United States Army JAG Corp. I had a wonderful live-in boyfriend and President Barack Obama spoke at my graduation. Hope flourished and happiness abounded.

Then I found out that my student loan lender would not approve a bar study loan. Lender told me something about my debt being very high and not having enough credit to justify the extra $5,000 being tagged onto my educational investment of over $100k. I worked three jobs while studying for the Indiana bar to make ends meet. My failure at that exam came as no surprise in retrospect, but was absolute heartbreak in the moment. The Army let me keep my appointment, if I passed the February Bar.

I geared up to take the February Bar. My living expenses became easier to manage when my boyfriend took on all of the rent. I cut down to one job, then to none to have time to study. I worked hard, doing all of the prescribed BarBri lectures and exercises every day. Then one evening in January my mother called. My father was in the hospital. Yes, he was alive. No, there was no cure. He had about one year. Come home when you can. Daddy needs you now. I can’t take care of him alone.

I failed the exam again. My world ripped apart. No more Army job. No more dreams of paying back my debt and traveling the world. My boyfriend moved with me into a two room apartment over top of a Chinese restaurant near my childhood home in upstate New York. He complained I spent all my time with my parents and that he shouldn’t have to find a job to pay rent for that shitty apartment. After sleeping on my couch for a month, I threw him out. I begged for (and thankfully got) a flexible job as an administrative assistant, which brought in $10.40/hour, but allowed me to leave when my dad would have his spells.

It was the fall of 2010 by then, and I felt like a complete failure at life. I had a miserable family, enormous debt, a crappy job, and a broken heart. People either avoided me entirely or started every conversation with “I’m so sorry…”. The depression was very strong, and some days felt like an eternal hell. I slowly found my way out, by focusing on the small things I did have.

I have a wonderful dog. I have an awesome chicken soup recipe. I met a nice guy who kept asking me out to dinner, despite my melancholy aura and clearly-sad-but-trying-to-be-happy smiles. He asked me about the law and how I felt about the morality and ethics of current events, just to see me perk up enough to argue with him. I started to remember why I went to law school in the first place. I began to feel feisty again.
With A LOT of support and encouragement from him, my mother and my co-workers, I took the New York State Bar. I’ve never been more scared, as I truly believed my entire value as a person lay within that test result. I passed. I’ll be sworn in next month (July 2011). I still cry when I think about it.

I’m in the process of setting up my own practice. I’ve learned a lot about myself and life in the past years, and my priorities are certainly much different. I refuse to be beholden to a job and I will not slave away at law firm trying to earn my dues by reaching a prescribed set of billable hours. I have spent years feeling beaten down and unworthy of success, emotions I will not accept as excuses anymore. I am a professional. I can provide services to my community to help ease suffering and preserve dignity. I plan to focus my practice on family law, with some criminal misdemeanors – my passions since my law school days.

I have been conducting informational interviews with local counsel for several weeks. I’ve found that most lawyers in this rural area are hungry for work, but almost all of them refuse to go to Family Court - too much drama. A majority of the local attorneys don’t have websites. If they do, it isn’t functional or it’s just a one page ad to call them. Most refuse to bill flat fees.

*To note, I live in a very rural area in Upstate New York, where a lot of people don’t have access to the internet and still utilize the public library for computers. I don’t know how much business a website would pull in, but at least nobody else would be competing with me through that forum for clients (or so I hope).

I’m still in the planning phase, but I’m trying to make sure I check off at least one “to-do” every day to make sure I am working toward my goal of opening my doors by August 1. I’m slowly deciding on my practice model – flat fee billing is currently winning me over. I’m getting the word out to my professional contacts that I’ll be practicing family law and criminal misdemeanors. A few colleagues have already asked when I open my doors, and if I’ll handle their traffic ticket cases, so I’m hoping that’s a good sign.

I quit my admin assistant job, effective July 1. I bought domain names and am learning how to make a website that works and (hopefully) looks good. I found inexpensive but beautiful office space next to an attorney who is looking to retire and travel. My father left me his entire office (he was a city planner), which negates all of my initial office overhead expenses, like most furniture and office supplies. I bought a Lexis account. I bought a discounted iPhone ($50 for last year’s model sounded fine to me). I’m looking into malpractice and health insurance. I guess I need an e-Fax service? Then I can order business cards and letterhead.

I do have specific questions I need to find answers to, such as:

How do I develop intake sheets and a standard retainer?

If I bill flat fee do I still need a trust account for each client with traditional billing follow-up letters stating the amount removed for services rendered?

Should I bill hourly before making the leap to flat fee?

Should I accept credit cards?

Do I really need to invest in Quickbooks yet?

Do I make my practice a PLLC or should I stay un-incorporated for now?

How do I create a business plan for a solo firm?

Do I need a credit card?

Of course, most of these questions assume I’ll have clients, which seem like mythical creatures at the moment: Where do they come from and how do I find them?

I bought a number of books about starting a firm (Foonberg’s, Elefant’s and some others that looked reputable). I like Solo By Choice, but the others give very outdated technological advice and mandate things I don’t understand the purpose of, like “make sure a photograph of your family is on your desk.” (Um, so my client knows who to hold hostage if they’re unhappy with me? Or to remind me the people in the picture need to eat too, so I better find work?)

I am reading blogs for encouragement, advice and support. Yours has been an outstanding resource, and I love digging through your archives to read about your early days. Thank you for chronicling your journey. If you or any of your readers has advice about starting as a solo in a rural area, or marketing in a rural area, I’d appreciate the knowledge. Thank you for the opportunity to ask you my questions.

First of all, I just want to congratulate you for as far as you've come so far. You haven't been given any breaks in life, and it takes a lot to keep picking yourself up off the ground. I'm proud of you.

Now, on to the practical stuff. It sounds like you've been thinking about this for a while and have started doing some planning. That's great. You've got an idea of what you want to practice that's focused enough for your geographic area (doesn't sound like many people want to do family law) and you've already been getting out there and letting people know about it. Let's just get right into answering your questions.

1. How do I develop intake sheets and a standard retainer?

Get out there on the internet and make something up. What kind of information do you want to find out when a potential new client comes in? That's what you make your intake sheet ask. And there are tons of retainer agreements out there.

2. If I bill flat fee do I still need a trust account for each client with traditional billing follow-up letters stating the amount removed for services rendered?

Nope. I still have a trust account just in case I need it, but if your fee is earned upon receipt it's yours. Put it in your bank account. Check your local rules of professional conduct to find out exactly what that means (Washington State, for example, requires specific language in the fee agreement about when the client might be entitled to a refund - if I die or lose my license, for example).

3. Should I bill hourly before making the leap to flat fee?

It's your law firm, it's your choice. Weigh the pros and cons and make a choice. If it doesn't work, change it up a little bit.

4. Should I accept credit cards?

Yes.

5. Do I really need to invest in Quickbooks yet?

I say no, particularly if it's just you. Your finances will be prettyhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif easy to take care of - how much money is coming in, how much is going out? A spreadsheet will probably work at the beginning.

6. Do I make my practice a PLLC or should I stay un-incorporated for now?

I personally chose to create an entity at the beginning. I think it just makes everything cleaner later on. If it's just you it's a pass through anyway. It doesn't make things that much more complicated for running the business.

7. How do I create a business plan for a solo firm?

I've blogged about this before. Here is a post I found on starting a law firm business plan. I've got some other posts out there. There's a bunch of stuff out there on the internet. Remember, a law firm is no different than any other business. You need to know what kind of business you're going to run (area of practice), how you're going to run the business (processes), and how you're going to get clients (marketing).

8. Do I need a credit card?

I have no idea. Is it important to establish your credit as quickly as possible? Yes. I have a credit card I put monthly expenses on and pay off every month. Helps to build up some points for fun later and helps to establish good credit. At the end of the day it's up to you.

Hope these questions helped. And remember, you can read all the information and books that are out there but eventually you're going to just have to start trying stuff and see what works for you. Good luck!

Marketing a Law Firm | The Use of the Golf Course

Before I get going on this, you don't have to be a golfer to get somehttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif great information out of this post. In a lot of ways this post is supposed to help you do some of the things you like to do while getting new business, making more money, and at the same time expensing an activity you really like to do - which is one of the great things about starting a law firm - you can actually do all three at once.

I don't know if I've talked about this much, but I love to play golf. One of my goals is to play on the senior PGA tour some day (I've 19 years to get ready). The golf course, for me, is a great place to hang out with friends, release some of my competitive energy, gamble, and drink all at once. What more could you ask for?

Oh, you want to market your law firm too? Fine. You can do that too.

First things first, you've got to approach this type of marketing, often referred to as "networking" with a specific state of mind. In fact, I don't even like to call it networking. I like to think of it as "relationship building," because that's what it really is. The purpose isn't for someone to necessarily give you business that day but to create a relationship of trust and respect so that when they or anyone they know needs your particular kind of help they'll call. If you think of this as a hassle, as a means to get another business card, then you are doing it all wrong. No matter what kind of event I go to I always try to meet two to four new people and really get to know them a little bit. Then I have a happy with them and get to know them more. And on and on, eventually, maybe, to the golf course.

The great thing about starting a law firm and marketing a law firm is that almost anything counts toward both. So long as there is a business purpose behind what you're doing, it's a business expense. And, whether you realize it or not now, identifying as many things as possible as business expenses will really help your bottom line.

Finally, to the point of the post - how to use the golf course for law firm marketing.

I use it for two reasons. The first thing I use it for is to establish new connections. There is no better way to get to know someone than to spend 4 hours with them out on the golf course. You get to see how they handle stress (the three foot putt for par), success (when they knock one close or hit a great shot), and failure (we've all duffed a shot here and there). And they get to see the same from you - it's a great way to form a bond right from the get go. Typically I do this by having someone I know invite a couple of people out so we can meet and play - no obligations. At the end of the round I give them my business card, get their card, and follow up with a happy hour or some other kind of meeting - instant business relationship, and I got to play a round of golf.

The second way I use golf for marketing my law firm is as a thank you. We are not allowed to pay people for referrals where I practice, and I don't. But that doesn't mean I can't thank the people that mean the most to my practice - those that refer me business. Every once in a while I'll just call a couple of people that refer me business and ask them if they want to play a round. I'll introduce everyone to each other, solidify the bond, and make sure to say "thank you" for thinking of me when someone they knew needed help. It's completely random and I often invite people that haven't referred me business in a while, so it's not a reward for the specific business, it's simply saying I appreciate you.

Hopefully it's not too difficult to see how this could translate to whatever it is you like to do. A baseball fan? Invite some potential referral sources or good clients to the ball game. Like the opera? Do the same thing. Paintball? Organize a game. Whatever it is, imagine how you can use that to form some business relationships and run with it. You'll be better at selling yourself because you'll be in a comfortable place (and by selling yourself I simply mean making meaningful connections - showing people that you are trustworthy and know what you are doing in your business) and you'll have fun at the same time.

See you Friday - we'll have another starting a law firm story. I'm off to court!

Being feminine in everyday life

One of the things I love most about being born a girl, is the chance to indulge in the daily expression of being feminine. The ideal French woman is the ultimate in sophisticated elegance and femininity.

Here are some of my favourite ways to feel feminine every day:

- I remind myself to walker slower and more elegantly. I imagine I am a chic woman in a movie. Channelling Amelie or another movie character is fun if I am feeling in a frump. It immediately makes you lighter on your toes and more expressive, in a non-over the top way of course.

- Wearing soft, pretty colours near my face. Or softening a dark top with pearls or a scarf that throws a flattering light onto my complexion. Wearing a bright colour feels very feminine too. Not a clown of brights though, one bright colour with a neutral is my favourite way. Red with white, denim with Kelly green, black with soft blush pink/beige.

- Standing up straight, imagine a string pulling me up from the crown of the head. Imagine you are a ballet dancer when you move.

- Wear lightly applied makeup in soft, sheer tones that flatter my colouring. Ensure there are no hard lines and that everything is well blended.

- Eat and drink in moderation. Indulge in chic foods I could imagine a svelte Parisian woman eating. Sometimes if I am stuck for a lunch idea I ask myself, if I lived in my bijoux Paris apartment, what would I make? And I must admit, as much as I enjoy relaxing with a tasty brandy, I always feel more feminine with a sparkling mineral water.

- Doing daily stretches and going for gentle exercise walks. I do errands on foot if they are near. A tote bag is used including sunglasses, and a fold-up umbrella if the weather is inclement.

- Let not one critical word come from my mouth, either about myself or others. This is an ongoing challenge for me. I am working on overruling negative thoughts with positive ones. And trying to be so instantly judgemental.

- Make my thoughts positive – it softens the face. It really is incredible how facial expressions (on a seemingly neutral face) can make you seem hard or soft.

- Washing hair more frequently. Men love clean, fresh-scented hair.

- Take an extended bathroom spa time on the weekend. Exfoliate thoroughly over my whole body, apply lotion, polish toe-nails.

- Part of my coming home routine in the evening is to remove all jewellery. But I sometimes leave something on, ie pearl earrings. Just to be pretty.

- Lightly spritz with a feminine fragrance every now and then.

- Surrounding myself with feminine colours. Not just in clothing and makeup, but everything in my life – home furnishings, stationery etc. Some of my favourite colours are soft beige-pinks, creamy whites and silvers, dove grey, ethereal seaglass blue-green.

- Playing music as a background, much like movies do. Gentle classical pieces and relaxing spa music is fabulous for having on low as I go about my day. French hotel sounds such as Buddha Bar, Six Senses and Hotel Costes are a enjoyable alternative that instantly make my everyday life seem much more cool. They are often very sexy too. And that’s never a bad thing.

- Having softness around me – mohair rugs in the winter or soft, cool cotton palazzo pants in the summer. One of my favourite ways to make a difference to the bed is to place a light-weight duvet inner under the sheets as a kind of mattress topper. It makes your bed feel very luxe and cloud-like. And it stays in place under the fitted sheet, even without straps or elastic. I like that I can wash it regularly too, unlike my mattress, which doesn't really fit in the machine.

- Being a domestic goddess. It's true what they say about a home needing a woman's touch. As I enter or leave a room I try to do one thing to straighten or tidy. I open the windows every day, even in winter if only for an hour or two, so that our house smells airy and fresh. Making your home a peaceful retreat for you and your family is a very feminine thing to do.

I’m sure I’ve not listed many other details. What are your favourite ways of being feminine?

Watercolour by Beverly Brown

Starting a Law Firm Stories | The Bankruptcy Lawyer

Another day, another successful starting a law firm story. This week, though, we're going to have an added feature - I'm going to break down this guy's website and give him some ideas for improvement. I won't do this for everyone, but this guy's in my city, he wrote me what seems like forever ago, and I didn't get back to him until today because I suck. So he gets a little bonus as an I'm sorry.

And I apologize for this, but this one's going to be long (though it's going to be packed with some ridiculously great information).

First things first, this guy, as the title implies, is a Seattle bankruptcy lawyer (if you want to see his site, click on the link). As you might expect, this is a highly competitive niche. There are at least hundreds of people out there trying to get exactly the same clients he is. And that's okay - as long as you're better than they are. Here's his story:

Hi, my name is Joe (name changed) and I recently started my firm in Seattle, WA. My law firm primarily focuses on helping people solve their debt problems by helping debtors file chapter 7 and chapter 13 bankruptcy or helping debtors settle their accounts. Additionally, I am looking to get more work in trademark, business and entertainment law.

I moved back to Seattle around November of last year after going to law school and working for a few years in Denver, Colorado. I had the pleasure of graduating from law school in one of the worst economies ever (2008) but was lucky enough to find a full time associate attorney job in early 2009 doing real estate litigation insurance defense. Unfortunately that job only lasted 6 months as I became the first attorney ever laid off by that particular firm due to the said economy and lack of business.

Fortunately I had a buddy who had recently started a bankruptcy firm in Denver and he offered me part time work while I looked for full time work. I was looking for over a year, was a finalist for a few jobs I interviewed for, but unfortunately there was always another applicant with more experience. I finally came to the conclusion that I had to go out on my own if this whole law thing was going to work out.

I had learned some applicable skills (especially in SEO with the Denver firm ranking #1 for most terms) through my work experience and decided if I was going to go out on my own I should do it in my hometown of Seattle. I launched my website, www.bankruptcy-law-seattle.com last September and packed up and moved from Denver to Seattle last November. I started getting serious about the firm in January of 2011 and so far things have been taking slower to develop than I initially thought it would.

I have tried to focus on SEO and getting my website ranked on the first page of Google with mixed success. I am on the 1st or 2nd page for most terms I am looking to get ranked for, but have had a little help with getting on the Google Maps. I have been trying different marketing techniques with mixed results and am always looking for things that might produce good results. I have also been contracting with several out of state firms which I am hoping will lead to profitable business.

So far I have too much free time, but if that changes and I get too busy I figure I can always hire some help so that would be a good problem to have. This month has been my best month so far, so I hope things continue to be on an upward trend.

Before we even get to the website, let's talk about the story.

1. Your Story

I think it's probably pretty indicative of a lot of stories out there. Economy sucks, can't find a job, make a job. That's totally cool. But, let's dig in a little bit further and talk about a couple of things.

1.1 Area of Legal Practice - Bankruptcy and ...

Your description of the bankruptcy work you do is great. The rest of it, not so great. If you want to pursue business, entertainment, and trademark law, you're going to have drill down more. There are many practices that focus on just business, just entertainment, and just trademark, and even with special niches within those practice areas. If that's what you want to do great, but don't expand your practice areas just because you aren't getting the business you want right now. The last thing you need to do is lose your focus on your bankruptcy practice because you're pursuing a couple of shiny objects out in the distance.

My advice, not knowing anything other than what you've written, is to give it six months of just going after bankruptcy exclusively. We'll come up with some ways to fill some of the free time you have right now. :)

1.2 Marketing a Bankruptcy Practice

And here's how.

1.2.1 Start a Blog

First things first, you need to start a blog. Bankruptcy attorneys are a dime a dozen. You need to show people why they should hire you over someone else. And it shouldn't be because you are the cheapest. Start a blog today (here's a post on starting a law firm blog), and put up some video posts on there. Don't be afraid to be interesting! Think about the things that potential clients are interested in and write about them.

For example, I don't know anything about bankruptcy. If I were going bankrupt these would be some of the things I'd want to know:

1. Am I going to lose my house?

2. Am I going to lose all of my money?

3. Are there things I can do to keep more of my money and wipe out more of my debt?

4. What can you do that no one else will do?

Answer these questions and you'll have a great start.

1.2.2. Get Off Your Butt and Market

How can you do this? There are a couple of things I can think of righthttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif off the bat. First, make a list of all the places people facing bankruptcy go. I have no idea what they are but I hope you do. Now, call those places and offer to do a presentation on how to save your ass-ets if you're going into bankruptcy. If they aren't interested ask them if you can post a flyer. You'll have a room full of potential clients immediately.

Second, go to a local farmer's market and open a booth. Make a sign that says "Bankruptcy Lawyer - Questions Answered for Free." All they have to do to get a question answered is give you their contact information and take a card. It will blow your mind how many questions you'll get - and clients.

That should give you plenty of things to do. And here's my experience with marketing a law firm by going to the farmer's market. It was great.

1.3 Your SEO Efforts

I'd love to hear more about what you are doing for this. If I were you, my goal would be to be number one for "Seattle bankruptcy lawyer" and Seattle bankruptcy attorney." When I just checked you weren't on the first page for either (maps doesn't count). If you're not on the first page you might as well be on the 10th page.

Starting the blog will help. Follow my instructions and you'll build yourself a great site to link from (kind of like this). But you've got to write from the heart, and you've got to write regularly, no matter how much it sucks.

I hope part of your SEO is getting links to your site, and I hope, I pray, that it doesn't involve commenting on anyone else's site or Avvo. Those are bogus. We'll talk more about it when we have our happy hour, but you're wasting your time if that's what you are doing.

1.4 Make a Law Firm Marketing Plan and Stick to It

From your email it looks like you are trying a whole bunch of things half way and hoping one of them sticks. For example, this "out of state business thing" makes no sense to me. Maybe you're talking about standing in pro hac vice for someone or something. But I'd focus my efforts locally if you want to have a consumer bankruptcy practice.

Here's my suggestion. First, turn off your computer, your television and your phone. Second, sit down with a piece of paper. Third, think about who your ideal client is - write that at the top of the page, and be specific. Age, gender (if applicable), occupation, education, etc. If you know a foreign language that's a great niche to get yourself into. Fourth, think about all of the places your type of client hangs out - write them down. Fifth, think of ways you can get into those place to get in front of said potential clients - write them down. Sixth, execute plan to get ideal clients.

If the idea won't get you in front of your client, don't do it. Give your ideas at least 3 months to see if they work. Everything in marketing takes time to stick.

Okay, have I beat you up enough? :) No? Okay, let's talk about your law firm website. But, before I do that I do want to point out that this is all meant to be constructive criticism. I am excited that you had the guts to go out on your own and I want to see you succeed. Now on to more criticism!!

2. Seattle Bankruptcy Lawyer Website Critique

I'm going to break this down page by page (though I won't talk about every page). Before I even get there I want to talk about the general layout and give you a couple of suggestions.

2.1 Overall Layout

First, your site is way to busy. When you are putting this together you need to think about what it looks like from the potential client's perspective. When I first saw I simply thought "information overload!" Scale it back a little bit. Say more with less. And, if you can, square everything up. The diagonal lines are a bit disconcerting.

2.1.1 URL

Second, your URL is bankruptcy-law-seattle.com, but you have links on here for business, trademark and copyright, and sports and entertainment, in addition to a button on the right that says "business law." I don't know about you, but I am not calling a bankruptcy lawyer to talk about business formation - there's just something ominous about that. This is a website about bankruptcy - don't gum it up with a bunch of other stuff.

If you want to be a business lawyer and a sports lawyer that's fine - but build out separate websites for them. Bankruptcy clients don't care that you know trademark law, and sports clients don't care that you know bankruptcy. They want to know how you can help them with their specific problem.

If you want to tie it all in create a home site that let's you link out to all of your other specific sites (another great SEO trick). You've already got it for your email.

2.1.2 Left Side of Page

Do we need to keep telling people what you do? Maybe that should be "Five Critical Questions Answered" or something like that instead of "Practice Areas."

"Resources" - just make the word a link to your resources.

"Tell us about your case." Do you really need the security phrase? Are you getting spammed that much? For me it immediately says "I don't trust you."

Think of some educational and helpful things to put over there.

2.1.3 Right side of page

Okay, I like what you have here. The only problem is, what am I supposed to do and why is it so lawyerly? Take off the "consumer bankruptcy" and "debt settlement" titles and put in three words really big - CLICK HERE TO - and then leave the rest of the stuff underneath. And don't send them to more information, send them to your contact page or have a window pop up where they can put in your information.

Here's the key about bankruptcy - they don't care HOW you do it they just want you to do it. (Add those pages the button links to to your resources - About Consumer Bankruptcy, for example)

Take off the business law button and replace it with another bankruptcy subject people can click on.

2.1.4 Footer

This is another great area to put in some keyword links. Remember to use the words you think people will be using to find you - Seattle bankruptcy lawyer - for example. Your words aren't descriptive enough right now.

2.2 Bankruptcy Lawyer Home Page Critique

Let's just go from top to bottom.

"Call us today: (206) 390-9451." Why are we calling? To get a quote? To get a consultation? Just to talk? Tell them WHY they should call today. And make it bigger.

2.2.1 Text in Middle of Page

The text portion of your site needs to be updated big time. I like the big bold print at the top, but remember you aren't talking to a bunch of lawyers you're talking to regular people. For example, just change the word "obtains" to "gets" and you've made a huge step. You could also just say "We Can Make the Phone Stop Ringing from Debt Collectors in 48 Hours. Call Now to Find Out How!" That's catchy. That is enticing to people. That makes people pick up the phone. Obviously if that's not true then don't say it, but think about why people are coming to your site and then tell them how you can solve their problem, if they just pick up the phone.

The text itself is not great. It's too wordy. It's too lawyerly. It's too much like what everyone else says. Let's break it down sentence by sentence.

"We are a Seattle based law firm practicing in the areas of Consumer Bankruptcy, Debt Settlement, Business and Intellectual Property (Trademark and Copyright) law." That sentence took me fifteen minutes to write because I fell asleep three times. First, people know what you do, you tell them that in the bold print! Second, no one cares about the other practice areas. This sentence is a great place to piggyback from the bold print. Do it. I'd say something like "Phone ringing at all hours of the night? Afraid to leave your car in the driveway because it might get repossessed? Wondering how you're going to pay the bills next month? We can answer those questions for you. We can help you get your first good night's sleep in months. We can help you get rid of the debt that is weighing you down like a ton of bricks." Isn't that way more appealing?

"We offer a compassionate and dedicated Seattle bankruptcy lawyer in the areas of chapter 7 and chapter 13 bankruptcy as well as an attorney well versed in business matters to ensure you have a partner in navigating your way through the complex Washington state and federal legal system." Wow. That's all I have to say.

The rest of the text is just as bad. Scrap it and start over. Tweak it until an 8th grader can not only read it but will want to pick up the phone and talk to you.

One other thing about your text - work in some of your keywords to tell Google what the page is about. I'd try to say Seattle bankruptcy lawyer and Seattle bankruptcy attorney once on each page. Don't link it out on your home page (sort of like it is now), but do it on your subpages linking back to your home page. And never link your firm name - no one cares about that.

2.2.2 Areas of Practices Section of Page

I would change this to say "Seattle Bankruptcy Lawyer" "Seattle Bankruptcy Attorney" "Seattle Business Lawyer" "Seattle Sports Lawyer" etc. Don't people to click on them because they won't and that's not the point. Point the links toward the relevant site and then you'll start to get some great Google juice from your home page.

2.3 Wrapping Up the Seattle Bankruptcy Lawyer Website Critique

I'm too tired to keep going, but I think you get the drift. You've got good bones here, but it can be so much better. Take of your lawyer hat, but on your businessman hat, and start thinking about what your potential clients are interested in seeing.

Can't wait for that beer!

Lessons from the Movies--Planting and Returning Images to Create a Satisfying Ending

There's a place in every book where all the assembled objects begin to balance.  They have slowly come together through many pages and form a cohesive whole.

Of course, this is the end of the story.  It's supposed to be satisfying, even if it leaves us with questions and aches to know more.  It should never leave us confused, however.  All the elements brought into play during the book must be accounted for.

I find that ending a story, especially a book's story, is hard.  Every book I finish offers its own particular agony in its ending.  Endings leave me really concerned--what sleight of hand to perform that will bring delighted gasps from
my reading crowd.  How to make a cohesive whole that works!  I hate leaving holes, where the reader is left thinking back over the story and wondering where this or that object or person has disappeared to, because it annoys me as a reader.

I just finished a nonfiction book that was published this year, Your Book Starts Here, and I ran into the same dilemma with it as I did with my novel or memoir manuscripts.  There was so much more to say!  But I had to say goodbye sometime, so when was the best moment?  And how did I know that I'd successfully wrapped up all the important points I'd launched in the early pages?

Last night I watched a movie that showed me exactly how good endings are born--from the end backwards, a pathway laid carefully through the story via a technique that writing teacher Rebecca McClanahan calls "plant and return."

The movie wasn't all that recent (2007), but a friend had recommended it.  It's a bit violent, in the way of bank robbing, con men, films, but it's so well crafted from a story point of view, I thought about it long after the final credits.  It's called The Lookout, and stars Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Chris, a young man who is living with the sad effects of a car accident that left his brain askew (TBI) when he meets up with a con man who muscles him into helping with a bank robbery.  Jeff Daniels plays Chris's roommate Lewis, a blind man who has a talent for R&B guitar playing.  Chris makes huge breakthroughs in his stalled-out guilt over the car accident (two friends died) and saves Lewis in the end, but only because he heeds Lewis's advice to "tell the story from the end."  When Chris is in dire straights, he begins imagining what he'd like the ending of the story to be.  Then he works backwards, taking notes to remind himself of each step.  Then he carries those steps out.

To me as a viewer, this was brilliant--a concept of a higher order placed in the midst of a shoot-em-up film.  Then I read the screenwriter was the same who'd written Out of Sight and Get Shorty.  Out of Sight, with George Clooney and Jennifer Lopez, featured the same intricate weaving as The Lookout.  The ending is written first, it seems, in the screenwriter's mind--where would we like to be at the finish line?  Then the writer carefully tracks each element backwards through the previous scenes.

Chris uses a notepad and pen to keep track of all that his brain no longer remembers.  These are featured as crime solving tools later, introduced as basic life tools earlier.  A great plant and return.  He often locks his car keys in the car, but he keeps a spare in his boot.  We see him open the car with the boot-hidden spare several times early in the movie; then, when he's being chased by the bank robbers near the end, he again locks himself out of the car and uses it in the nick of time.  Again, a plant and return--an image used earlier, quite innocently, ends up being pivotal to the ending.

I love to trace this technique back through my own books.  Begin at the end, find an important image, and read backwards to see where it is planted and where it returns and why.

I've found that unless I make all the important images repeat, culminating at the ending, it's frustrating for the reader.  Remember Anton Chekhov's admonition:  if you put a gun on the mantelpiece in Act 1, it must be fired by Act 3.  Very true.

This Week's Writing Exercise
1.  Make a list of all the important images in your story.  Begin with the objects--the easiest to identify.  You can also include thematic images, such as clouds, a river, arranging flowers, etc.  Or certain pieces of clothing, music, and food that are important to your book.

2.  Find out where these land in Act 3.  How are they used in the culminating sections of your story?

3.  Then trace each back through the chapters, seeing where they are planted and returned to.  If you find huge sections where an important image drops out of sight, ask yourself why--is it intentional or is it something that needs fixing?

4.  Get a copy of The Lookout and enjoy watching a master screenwriter use this technique (warning:  it's moderately violent and may offend some).

Guest Post: French Chic Rules

A dear friend of mine wrote this piece which I wanted to share with you. It follows on from my last post. Enjoy.

French Chic Rules, by Coco:

After reading Fiona's post this morning, it gave me inspiration. A question was answered on how to maintain French Chic and a wonderful answer followed. It was brilliant because it's different for all of us, and what inspired the change in this woman first is what Fiona steered her back to for more inspiration. This is so true!

For me, hands down it was first the book Entre Nous, then the French Chic group, then I found Anne Barone. Other books followed after that, but these were the triggers for me, the ones that got me truly excited. It was like opening another door that showed it's possible to live this way. I think it changed me forever, (in my mind). Implementing those changes into my daily life has been much harder than I thought it would be.

This post will explain why I'm going to once and for all make permanent changes in my own life that align with French Chic rules. These are my rules. They may be different for someone else, but I'm choosing what is important to me.

What I've learned is that French Chic is more than a mental epiphany that you agree with. If you want to live it, you must decide and then take small daily steps toward that goal. It's not a grand sweeping gesture or a one-time makeover.

There is never a perfect time when the stars will align for your start date. If you are resolved to stand on your own and live this lifestyle, you must give in to daily effort. Effort needs to be planned, scheduled and eventually, bad habits will be replaced with good ones. It's all about finding your own personal road map.

For me, it's been very stop and go and that doesn't work. This all or nothing approach is like dieting, you either are on it, or you are not. It's temporary if you are not resolved to personal change for good. I have finally realized I'm going for a permanent lifestyle change. Change takes a bit of reprogramming, especially as women who tend to analyze and think too much.

I feel like I'm on the verge of something great and important to me. It's as if there is hope and a chance to improve my life in ways that truly matter to me. I'm ready to be honest and kick my bad habits to the curb. I'm ready to reclaim my life and live exactly how I want to live, down to the last details. It will require giving up some things that comfort me. Here are just a few of my bad habits, consider yourself warned:

-being lazy-couch surfing-watching too much reality tv-hiding behind my fat-letting trashy influences in my life-gossip-anger-fear-pity-eating junk food-eating fast food-eating out too much-shopping out of boredom and with no real plan-worrying what others think-fear of criticism-bad grooming habits-frumpiness-being ordinary-dressing safe-boring shoes-not having a signature look-rarely going out-instant gratification-not finishing projects-not having a hobby-eating in front of the tv-eating in secret-overspending on impulse-not participating in life-not seeking pleasure-insecurity-sporadic flossing :)-in general a lack of regular maintenance-lack of exercise-and the list goes on and on and on and on...

Each and every one of these could be a post on its own. This is important to me, as if my future depends on it. Before I always thought French Chic was something I could dabble in, but never become. Now I get it, I can change if I really want to. It's sort of like bringing your Inner French Girl to the forefront of your life and morphing into her. She's not someone you keep hidden away only to prance her out every once in a while. What's the use in keeping your best hidden?

My first role model is Coco Chanel pictured above. I admire her drive and determination to create a life. She had her own look, her own ideas, and she didn't waver. She fought for her own vision and was successful. She also overcame a tragic childhood to become a confident strong woman. I think she had fantastic instincts.

Starting a Law Firm | Your Story Friday

As I promised, this is the first of hopefully many posts from you all about your journey to starting your own law firm. I want to know why you decided to start a firm, the story behind, and how it's been. We can all learn from each other here, and I know there are more great stories out there to be told.

So, without further adieu, here is Scott's story. Looks like he's an Albany personal injury attorney and Saratoga Springs Employment lawyer. Enjoy!

I just read your post, and read your blog with some frequency. Here's my story:

I am 32. I worked for a small(ish) firm out of lawschool for about 5 years. It was a great group of people, and I am greatful for the lessons that I learned during those years. I had always thought about going out on my own, and found myself very interested to talk with friends who had made the decision. My largest concern, obviously, was business, and that was the one thing I was not really picking up at my firm - how to develop business.

With some hesitation I left the firm and took a position with a larger firm as a partner, co-leading the litigation group. I initially enjoyed the work, which allowed me to represent plaintiffs in employment and serious personal injury cases. I quickly realized, however, that the firm was not a good fit for me. Once I realized that I decided it was time. After talking it over with my wife, who is also a lawyer (and my biggest supporter), I gave notice and was on my way.

I opened the doors to Peterson Law Firm around April 1. (I didn't literally open them, I worked from my home office until I found space that I was comfortable with, both financially and professionally). I was fortunate to have had a handful of great clients come with me, but since I represent mostly individuals in employment and personal injury cases, there is always that underlying concern over where the next case will come from.

So far business has been consistent. Some days I feel overwhelmed being on my own, but I've tried my best thus far to leverage technology to help. I quickly signed up for a cloud based file management system, which also does time keeping. I've set up dropbox for offsite file storage (love the iphone app), and I've outsourced my phone answering service as well as my dictation. I'm not quite ready for live help, but my goal is to be able to comfortably hire an assistant at the end of my first year.

It's been a crazy couple of months. There is absolutely nothing like working for yourself, and I honestly don't know that I'd ever work for someone else again (unless I had to). Thus far my biggest struggles have been with time management (it's been an adjustment coming from always having a full time assistant) and staying on top of my marketing. I have good contact with the legal community, and am going to begin writing a monthly column for my local bar journal next month. I have two blogs, although they have not been updated nearly enough. I built my website for the time being, and I have to say I'm enjoying seeing it moving up the search rankings (although not fast enough for me).

You are right on point about outsourcing. I constantly get messages from vendors trying to sell me a package which will "get [me] on the first page of google." Problem is, when I search for some of their clients (always ask for this), they are not on the first page of google.

For what it's worth to those considering going out on their own, I have had no less than 10 attorneys at larger firms tell me how much credit they gave me for, in the words of one, "doing something that most of us don't have the b*lls to do."

What's your story? What made you decide to start a law firm? How's it going? Let me know, tell me something interesting, and I'll post it.

Have a great weekend!

Reader Question

Wendy from Canada wrote and asked me -

"How do you regain your chicness when you have "fallen off the wagon"? For example, last Fall I bought some new clothes, improved my hair and makeup, lost a few pounds and had been doing a lot of interesting reading about the chic lifestyle. I felt really good!

Now I am feeling blah- don't feel chic at all. Just received some recent photos of myself from a family dinner where I look terrible (of course my sister circulated them widely.)

Does this happen to you? How do you get the chic feeling back?

How do the French gals keep feeling chic consistently? Constantly buying new things and treatments is not an option for me.

I think this question is such a great one. I know exactly what you mean about things being blah. I highly doubt French girls buy new things and have treatments to feel better. They don't throw away their money like we (I) do (used to).

In your family photos do you mean you look unchic because you have gained weight and your clothes don't look as good as you imagined? I usually find this is the main thing - I have been slack with my chic eating and kilos sneak on. Well they don't sneak on, but I ignore them for a while. Or sometimes the way I've done my hair is not flattering (usually from doing the least I can get away with - terrible!).

Just as you have listed what you did last year - buying some new clothes, improving hair and makeup, watching what you eat and becoming a bit slimmer in the process and keeping up with your reading, I think you may have answered your own question. You probably won't need to spend any money though - you already have the new clothes, it's just a matter of fitting better into them.

I think for me I get all enthused at a change and after a while it becomes routine, but rather than let it stay as my new 'French-inspired regime' I slip back to old habits. We have to remind ourselves constantly, and re-remember what it was that inspired us - go back to the books or websites you read.

Anne Barone is where my initial excitement for the French life came from and I still get a thrill picking up one of her books. It brings back to me that magical feeling that I had from discovering something new and fun.

Printouts I have kept, magazine articles I have torn out and books I have in my home library all remind me and re-excite me too. Can you remember where it was first that you heard about chic French women, the European way of life, being chic and slim? Try going back there.

And of course, maybe you are just tired out and a bit overwhelmed if you have a lot on your plate. It’s amazing how fast good intentions of chic changes fly out the window when life happens. In that case it’s a matter of dealing with what you have to and making the most of what little energy you have left. Keeping up with the basics of self-care is a good goal during busy times.

Making lists of how I want to be is a great inspirer too. I make lists of the attributes that my most elegant self possesses, my ideal Paris girl wardrobe, how my dream home looks and functions, just to name a few. Reading through them helps me want to be that way and resist temptation or make the extra effort. At the very least I can daydream.

Think of yourself as a project and advise yourself accordingly as if you were a wise, older (probably French) girlfriend. What would you say? It is so easy to give others advice, and it is quite effective to view yourself from without. I always come up with really good ideas for myself (whether I take them on is another matter altogether).

Even at the end of the day it’s not too late to start afresh. If your day has been frazzled and stressful, why not choose an early night over opening a kingsize bar of chocolate and reality tv. How much more nicer (and infinitely more chic) would it be to wash your face and then read in your tidied-up bedroom with soft music playing.

And then, there is always the option of being realistic. It’s quite a relief to think ‘I don’t have to be anyone other than who I am. I can make the most of what I have and be happy with that.’ After all, what is more attractive than a big smile and healthy self-confidence about a person. Sometimes when I’m sure people are looking at me thinking ‘who does she think she is’ (and I am feeling suitably intimidated), how are we to know they are not thinking the exact same thing?

Wendy, I hope these ideas have been helpful. I would also ask my lovely readers if they have any suggestions for Wendy and the rest of us. How do you get that chic feeling back when you are feeling less than motivated?

Image from Paris Daily Photo